Frank called on Saturday morning. He was looking for a substitute to "lead the discussion" in the High Priests Group on Sunday. "Lead the discussion" is a less threatening way of asking someone to "teach" a lesson in priesthood meeting. Not having read the manual, I asked what the lesson was about.
"It's about the organization and purposes of the Relief Society."
Great. I could almost hear the yawns of the bretheren from 30 hours away.
Frank is a good guy, however, so I reluctantly agreed. I could hear in his voice the "Lake Powell, here we come" glee as he thanked me repeatedly.
I confess that "reluctantly agreed" may be stretching the truth a bit. Although I had concerns about being able to liven up this particular topic, I really do enjoy teaching. I see it as something akin to performance -- using words, thoughts, ideas and poetic expression to coax the Spirit into a room, while stimulating discovery, wonder, delight and a desire to know more.
I read through the lesson material and was surprised to find several good hooks (questions or ideas) upon which to focus a "discussion," but there would still be a need for an ice breaker to loosen up the geezers and set them up for the more serious discussion to follow.
I considered showing a clip from LDS comic Johnny Biscuit's "Latter Day Night Biscuit" DVD wherein he mocks the sisters for combining "sticks and weeds and a glue gun" to turn a house into a home. But Biscuit's riff is perhaps a bit harsh (though hilarious) for a priesthood lesson. I opted for original material instead.
I went through our home collecting all the inspirational sayings from the latest R.S. homemaking fad: vinyl lettering on wood blocks or ceramic tiles. I then imagined how the sayings might change if guys had been involved in coming up with the phrases, rather than the women-folk. After setting up a table cloth and centerpiece to set the mood, I would start off the discussion with a few brief observations regarding the differences in how men and women (generally speaking) relate to the world around them. I then presented as evidence my lists of original sayings followed by the re-imagined guy versions as follows:
Families are Forever
Families are Forever........So Cool It!
Do What Makes Your Heart Sing
Do What Makes Your Heart Sing. But Please, No Opera
Friends are like Heirlooms, Always to be Treasured
Friends are like Heirlooms, Always to be Treasured, and dusted off whenever you need Money
Live, Laugh, Love
Live, Laugh, Love, Limbo!
What lies before us and behind us are small matters compared to what lies within us
What lies before us and behind us are small matters compared to what lies beside us
Christ is the Center of our Home, a Guest at each Meal, a Silent Listener to every Conversation
Christ is the Center of our Home, a Guest at each Meal, a Silent Listener to every Conversation - So can we please stop talking about bunions?
Be Your Own Kind of Beautiful
Be Your Own Kind of Beautiful...But a little mascara wouldn't hurt
Count Your Blessings
Count Your Blessings...Yes, you can use your toes
There's No Place Like Home
There's No Place Like Home, but I wouldn't mind a little more Maui time
As For Me and My House, We will Serve the Lord
As For Me and My House, We will Serve the Lord...Pizza
Now, the High Priests in my ward are a pretty tough crowd. They take that "avoid all loud laughter" advice pretty seriously and are generally a solemn and dignified group. Nevertheless, there were a few chuckles noted, at least from the younger bretheren. A few greybeards seemed shocked that anyone would attempt a comedic turn in priesthood meeting and thus were unsure as to how to respond. At least one other had already started in on his afternoon nap, not waiting for sacrament meeting, and others just didn't get it.
But Frank would have laughed had he been there.
And you know what? The tablecloth and centerpiece really did make a difference.
They made me laugh! I think you'd get more laughs in RS.
ReplyDeleteHILARITY! (sorry if it was me that made you hate opera ;) )
ReplyDelete"Although I don't drink alcohol, I drink coffee. I'm not ready to apply for a temple recommend. I donate more than 25% of my income to charity, but a relatively small portin of that goes to the LDS Church, and, until recently, I thought that "D&C" was a medical procedure." That's what I told the Bishop who knocked on my door to ask me (at the urging of ward-member-former-student Doug Brady)if I would consent to teach a class called "Gospel Doctrine."
ReplyDeleteIt seems that Doug assured the Bishop that I would keep the attendees interested and awake, going so far as to say to the Bishop, "If he doesn't meet your expectation, Bishop,I'll teach the class myself," which apparently impressed the Bishop sufficiently enough to be unruffled by my opening confession.
Knowing what all teachers know: That they always learn far more than their students, I thought it would pose an excellent opportunity for me to expand my limited knowledge of Mormonism, so I consented with, "OK, but can I bring a cup of coffee with me to class?"
The Bishop said, "No."
I said, "I can make that sacrifice." So for two years I taught the class, gained quite a following, quite enjoyed it, learned a lot, have a much greater appreciation for the LDS Church. My tenure ended when the ward was split. I donate more to the church now, but I still drink coffee.